Yesterday I was issued the following challenge:
"Pick one comic and one cartoon that, if you could, you would make into a movie. Assume it would be awesome".
It's a great idea but a damn big assumption. Hollywood certainly isn't shy about mining my beloved childhood chums, and they've proved entirely capable of cranking out turds the size of Galactus.
In fact, some of my more obvious choices have already sloughed off the silver screen on their way to a DVD bargain bin. Daredevil? Blech. Dark Phoenix? Dreck. Batman: Knightfall? Barforamathon.
As a rabid fanboy it's not hard to see the appeal of turning these franchises into films. After all, my love of them springs primarily from their place in my childhood, rather than their inherent value. Same with the films they spawn. Even if it blows, I must view them at least once, handing over $10 even as I curse my comically thick spectacles.
Frankly speaking, some of my favourite cartoons sucked, and I've read a lot of superhero comics that could charitably be refereed to as craptastic.
But, much like Michael Jackson's Moonwalker, my love for them continues on unabated despite their flaws, and the random nature in which a would-be paedophile turned into a weird spaceship.
So what then would I choose? I don't really want to pick something that's already been done a few times, even though I'm still waiting for an awesome Superman film and I've got an idea for a Wolverine movie that would blow at least one mind.
So I'm going to have to run with the Flash. (See what I did there?)
A lot of DC's comic characters are too batshit crazy to transition onto the screen. The Flash though? He's grounded, and his powers translate easily. In all honestly I don't know who you'd have him fighting, as my knowledge of his rogue's gallery extends as far as Captain Boomerang and Captain Cold.
Seriously though, if you're fighting a guy who can run faster than you can see, would you really trust a boomerang as the best tool for the job? Sheesh. Yo-Yo Master laughs at your inadequacy Captain Boomerang!
But I think it could be a really fun film. I'm mainly thinking of all the cool set pieces you could have with him. I wouldn't even need villains per se, just a dude cinematically fighting crime Matrix slowdown style.
As far as a cartoon, I'll cheat a little and pick one derived from something else (surely in the spirit of such a challenge). I'm going with Dungeons and Dragons.
I'd chuck the irritating kids and just use the universe. See, it's always surprised me that no-one's been able to make a good D&D film. After all, D&D is nothing less than a framework to be used for the telling of really awesome stories. Throw in a few creatures and spells recognisable to players and they'll drink it up like a Potion of Awesome +10.
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